Fighting for your Marriage

Paper Summary:

This paper explains that Markman, Stanley and Blumberg's, book "Fighting for your Marriage: Positive Steps for Preventing Divorce and Preserving a Lasting Love," is one of the many self-help books available and, on the surface, appears to be little different .The paper then comments that the difference is found rather quickly, however, as it is a preventive book rather than a 'fixit' book. Moreover, the book focuses on the construction of the relationship in order to help it weather storms and it offers uncomplicated and relevant information that, upon reading, seems like obvious truisms. The paper concludes that this book is a strong reminder that there are people out there genuinely concerned about the problem of divorce who are attempting to take a non-theistic approach to this seeming epidemic.

From the Paper:

"What advice the authors give, however, in this section is filled with the kind of "wouldn't it be great if everyone would do this" sort of optimism. They promote each person "investing" (195) in the relationship, and they promote the idea that even if one person is investing more than the other, that person will be encouraging the other to step up their game. But, what about the couple where there is a true imbalance, with one person being involved in the marriage and the other being dissonant and distant? The book simply says - the other will have to try and put an effort in. The problem, though, is that there is little advice, other than to "practice" and "seek counseling" to assist when one partner is so obstinate as to not become involved in the process at all."

Sample of Sources Used:

• Markman, Howard; Stanley, Scott & Blumberg, Susan. Fighting for Your Marriage. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, Inc., Publishers, 1994.

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